If you are planning to get married, I guess, there is… one universally accepted norm / procedure / protocol :
1. Fall in love ( why “fall”, is there any secret pointer here ? It should be “rise” no ? ).
3. If accepted, then fix the date and do it – tie the knot !!
In some cases though, it is not even love, it can be a simple crush, lust or infatuation …etc…, mistaken…for Love !!
Is that all ?
To me it all seems so incomplete.
Love is an emotion and emotions, like an old man’s blood pressure, are never constant.
Shaky, always…fluctuating. If it is constant then it is not love, emotions can not be constant… !!
When the base is shaky, can the building be stable ?
As the love keeps on fluctuating, so does the marriage.
No doubt, Love is a very important part of marriage, but is marriage, all …about…Love…..nothing… else ?
Can a part… be… the Whole ?
I guess we need to consult a ‘structural engineer’ ( ha…ha…) before laying the foundation stone of the building called “Marriage” !!
Marriage involves thousands of things, love being just the one of those…many important things !!
Love alone, is not and can not be, the basis of a successful marriage.
Talking of base, why not to start from the base with the basics.
Let us go to the First marriage ever – Grandpa Adam & Grand Ma Eve !!
Sex, money, lust all came after, this marriage was already successful.
Secret is and was, 100 % acceptance and the realization of importance, of each other. Eve was, in fact, a direct outcome of Adams need and his realization of her importance. Eve for Adam, was never a luxury item or an ‘item girl’.
Need & importance, ensured acceptance, an acceptance made further easy & threat-free, by the …absence of…CHOICE !!
Once married, door to undo the marriage, was permanently closed.
Adam and Eve did not behave like a couple of kids in a candy store because, there was no candy store. We HAVE candy stores, agreed. We can not get them closed, also agreed… but… we can always stop… shopping, even when there is a grand clearance sale !!
People ( me included ) are onions. Start peeling off the layers and be ready for a shock.
The Magic lies, not in the onion, but in “MY ONION” !!
To peel off just to see what is inside, is Satanic.
To accept ( 100 % ) the onion, to innovate with it, to use it in a recipe is Divine !!
The Secret to a successful marriage, is not in the onion – it is in the Recipe, your Recipe !!
Stop ” searching for / seeking Love” in your spouse’s recipe -“s/he doesn’t love me” !!
If you don’t have a recipe of your own, then find one, before you have the onion.
That reminds me, this ‘peeling off onions’ activity is getting very popular these days. But of course, we know it by a different fancy name – L.I.A ( “Live-in Arrangement”). LIA is very good for the people, not interested in getting married ( you know, some people simply peel off their onions and eat, as salad – very good !! ) but not a good option, as a ‘first step’ to getting married.
And let us be clear about one thing, onions don’t come with a replacement warranty / guaranty, if there is, then it is a Satanic Guaranty.
What do you say ?
Waiting for your opinions, feedback, perceptions ( I have just shared mine )…… !!
‘religiously’ religion-less and ‘religion-less-ly’ religious !!