Monthly Archives: December 2014

‘Calendar vs. Calendar’- God’s “ACR” !!


These days I rarely find any one ready to make a ‘good / kind entry’ in God’s ACR ( Annual Confidential Report ). And I don’t blame them either. Children are being killed, helpless girls are being raped. Violence, injustice, cheating, corruption……everywhere…… Heroes are losing, villains are winning or so…. it…..seems. And …”HE” definitely….promised He shall come every time evil starts getting an upper hand ( “yada…yada……”).

People have started asking all sorts of questions, wondering whether God has become too weak to help us or whether He has become too “old” to help anyone in need or He has simply ‘retired” from active service or taken some…….. time….. off or He simply is not a good God !!

The other day, in my dream, I happened to interact with a common house-fly and even she was very very angry at God. Not ready to put even one kind word, letter, coma, in God’s ACR. This house fly, shared her life’s woes with me. She said she had spent her whole life singing God’s praises and still, she had always struggled to fend for her and her family.

In her own words, ” I am at the fag end of my life and nothing good ever happened to me in my entire life. It’s so unfair, you know” !!

In the morning when I woke up, even then I was sorry for that fly. That day when I met my doctor friend, I shared that fly’s tragic story with him. And he started laughing. After I expressed my shock at his laughter, he told me that “an average house fly has a life span of 4 to 7 days. The fly in the dream, simply was pulling your leg”.

I was definitely shocked to hear that. But later, I could not help smiling at that naughty fly !!

After many days of rational thinking /analysis, I reached the conclusion that the fly can not be blamed. For us it is a matter of four five days but for her ‘it….is…… a…. life time’ !! Her life-span, her calendar, is …..different and our calendar is….. different !!

Legend has it that once Lord Shiva felt kind of offended at what Goddess Parvati had said, and He, the perfect gentleman that He is, did nothing but simply went and sat in ‘samaadhi’ (trance ). Goddess Parvati as the perfect wife, knew what to do in such situations. She simply went and sat….. quietly….. near the feet of Lord Shiva, as was her usual practice.

And He opened His eyes, after……… 48,000…. years !!

When I put two and two together, I understood and was able to solve this ‘cosmic puzzle / riddle’. All this confusion was caused by the different calendars prevalent in the Universe. For Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati, it was just a routine “lovers’ tiff”. Fight in the morning, love & peace in the evening but….. we all…..would take hundreds of births during that DAY’S time.

But then, surely God deserves a Day Out.

“Tomorrow” He…shall…. do the “needful” as per everyone’s individual file and merit !!

Justice has prevailed and shall prevail !!

So, ladies and gentlemen, with your permission, I add this, in God’s ACR :

“An excellent God” !!


Posted by on December 27, 2014 in Humor


‘Ground Zero’ – Dead Stay Dead !!

Love, Money, Immortality, ‘Moksh / Nirvaana’ – these are the four things, which we may find, in every one’s wish list.

Among these, Moksh is much sought-after / desired, but the least understood, rarest of rare, happening in the journey of the Soul. One good reason for being ‘rarest of rare’ is the ‘full stop’ which it puts, to the journey.

Arn’t we blindly following others in wishing Moksh ? Do we really understand it ?

To the best of my knowledge, there is only one known example of it – Lord Krishna. And at what cost he achieved / attained ‘Moksh’ !!

The Geeta, the epic, is a story of many heroes and heroines but for me it is the story of Lord Krishna and Gandhari ( the blind-folded queen of the blind king ) which in turn, is actually the story of Lord Krishna attaining Moksh.

After the Battle of Mahabharat is over, she tells the Lord :

” You could have prevented the killing of millions of people and my sons but you did not. I curse you. You and your family shall meet ‘sarvnaash’ ( total annihilation )”.

Lord Krishna knew that her curse would surely come true and he also knew, even in the beginning of the War itself, that how the War was going to end and how he would get the Curse, still he did every thing to ‘earn’ that Curse !! He WAS ready to pay the price.

Therefore, He accepts the curse, with folded hands !!

That ladies and gentlemen , is Moksh,…. plus and minus – zero. Cease to exist as an individual soul.

No more “I love you” no more “yes I do”. No more worldly music, no more good food. Beautiful girls will look beautiful but not for me. Best painters will paint but not for me. Best cooks will cook but not for me.
Best cricketers will play but not for me……!!

Yours truly is kind of scared.

What is (and where is ) the use of attaining something when ‘you’ know it too well that by the time you ‘achieve’ it… you will cease to exist.. cease to exist….. to celebrate…… what ‘you’ have……. achieved  !!

Thanks but No.

After you, ladies and gentlemen !!


Posted by on December 25, 2014 in Humor


Leonardo da Vinci – ‘find, fix and…worship’…Him !!

Leonardo da Vinci, is such an artist that you may know him or may not know him but still, everyone definitely knows what he has created – ‘Mona Lisa’, the greatest critically acclaimed ‘work of art’ on this planet. Even after hundreds of years since its creation, this painting remains, the center of attraction for all the art critics the world over.

But the art critics are definitely not staying over-night on their professional tables to know more and more about the artist / painter Leonardo da vinci. And rightly so. It is not needed … well. The work of art – Mona Lisa, is already in their critical hands and that is what matters the most.

However, what beats me is, when so much critical focus is devoted to  the greatest work of art on this planet, why… the case of….the Greatest Marvel of art and science (combined), in this Whole Cosmos – the Creation itself – the position is reversed by the critics ( religion-leaders ).
In this case, the religion-leaders / Gurus ( I definitely don’t mean the ‘religious-leaders / Gurus’ ) are unanimous and the popular cry seems to be  :

“don’t worry about the Painting ( the Creation ) but ‘find, fix and worship’ the Creator, the Leonardo (God )”.

These critics are the greatest conjurers / magicians / con artists on this planet. They have cast a spell on all of us and blinded us in such a way that we are unable to see and appreciate this ‘Work of Art’ especially so, when we ourselves are an important part of this Creative-Work, Created on an endlessly Long Canvas. The Creation is, an endless…. Performance…… by the Performer. Both ( Performance & the Performer ) are inseparable… especially, when the Concert is still on……. !!

The Creation itself is a proof (and we ourselves are a proof ) that the Creator has been there, is there and SHALL BE !!

Still, under a spell, the critics have convinced us that He needs to be ‘sought, achieved / attained and worshiped’. And surprisingly, in the same breath they tell us that He is……..Omnipresent !!

I am ready to ‘seek /attain’ the Creator but first, please…… teach me how to lose Him. You see I can’t. I am kind of stuck with Him Eternally. And surprisingly, although, I have never worshiped / prayed to Him, He still STAYS…… “Put”….like an ever adamant / loyal Spouse !!

I guess, this “finding Leonardo” is nothing personal, purely business – “their business”.

And these Critics are…….thorough professionals !!


Posted by on December 19, 2014 in Humor


Arithmetic ‘Mix-up’ of ‘poor, helpless’ Fanatics !!

For the last so many years, we have been trying our level best to eradicate fanaticism from religion / religions. We have not been very successful because we have ignored the vital ‘arithmetic’ which is the root-cause and a major driving force, behind fanaticism.

Religion and Faith go together. And faith is Faith, as long as it is 100 %. 95 % faith is a maddening, destructive force because 95 % faith actually means 5 % of DOUBT and this (5%) percentage (even though appears to be small and harmless) reduces the Faith to…….zero !!

For example, if you are married or in love / ‘relationship’, as long as you have 100 % faith in your partner / spouse, you are in Heaven………at peace.

Now have 5 % of doubt !!
The ‘virus’ is ….in….!!
And you ARE in……. HELL !!
Now, even a most peace loving person is ready to die / commit murder !!

An average fanatic is not a villain, s/he is like a person in love – a patient. His / her only fault is, s/he is in LOVE and therefore, possessive about his / her religion & wife / husband. A lover / beloved, having 95% faith, feels threatened in the company of other handsome men and beautiful ladies !!
A fanatic wants to eradicate this competition. His / her ‘funda’ is simple :

“become ‘mine’ ( of ‘my’ religion) or ….get killed, so that there is no threat to what is ‘mine’ and…….I can have my ‘100 %’ in Peace” !!

The poor, sick guy, is trying to find a ‘personal solution’ to a ‘personal problem’.

Wish, s/he knew the magic of having that additional 5 % of faith which can not, and therefore, DOES NOT, come from outside !!

And these famous or infamous patients suffering from “5% syndrome” prove to be more than willing learners and user-friendly ‘suction-pumps’, for the fancy “Apps” of wicked & mischievous Devil’s instructors /programmers / brain-washers, of terror.

And the perfect recipe for a ‘Future Black-Hole’ is ready !!


Posted by on December 14, 2014 in Humor


‘Vegan Tyrants’ vs. ‘Kind Killers’ !!



Many western developed countries, rightly accuse many eastern underdeveloped countries ( and the societies ) of illegally capturing, enslaving, torturing animals. They hold these countries guilty, of inhuman behavior and cruelty towards animals and of serious violations of animal rights.

For this, we Asians have to ‘plead guilty’.

But strangely enough, most of us still remain vegans / vegetarians and some are real time animal worshipers !!

What I find even more baffling is, that most of the western thinkers or “judges” from the ‘developed’ world after finishing their “judgement & jury” obligations, simply go home and enjoy / relish, the non-veg delicacies, prepared….. after killing the same poor helpless animals.

Is KILLING better and kinder than the “cruelty & torturing” ? !!

Does “killing”, serve the ’cause’ of the animals, in any way, better ?

Or is it simply “one of…..THOSE…. things”…..a case of unexplained human behavior?



Posted by on December 12, 2014 in Humor


‘Dating’…… the Future !!


For most of us, Future is something which is forever elusive. If we want to meet this Mr. Elusive we have to wait till it becomes our Present.

Our Creator has blessed me so much and in such a unique way that I am able to…. ‘date, share, love, serve, groom and change’……. Future.

It daily comes and sits… close to me……..on my benches.

Yes…..I am a teacher…… and proud of it !!


Posted by on December 11, 2014 in Humor


Dear Australians, Heroes & Martyrs are not “show-stoppers” !!

The cricket world is in too much of a shock to react to the Australians’ decision to cancel / postpone the first Test match between India and Australia.

Are they not trying to do a disservice to this Martyr who was unfortunate to die a most untimely and unfair death at the hands of an unfair and negative mindset / system, developed by the Australians themselves called ” sledging and intimidating” a set batsman refusing to get “out” ?

Where are the senior Australian cricketers now ( those great Lillys and Thomsons ) of 1970’s who said, “I am thrilled when I see a batsman’s blood on the pitch” ?
Aren’t they thrilled now ?

This time you have surpassed your own records and standards of negativity. This is a batsman and a very good batsman at that. And he is murdered on a pitch and your “pitch”, M/S. Lilly and Thomson.
Or…..are you shocked at this “self-goal” ?
But then, didn’t you know, “those who live by the sword shall parish by the sword”?

We are as sorry, as you are !!

Wake up and reform. Canceling a test match is not the solution. Cancel your negative mindset. There are no short cuts ( and “short-pitches” ) to get an accomplished, set batsman out. Let us go on with this gentleman’s game and pay our homage to that great departed hero. He would also have liked the game to continue and not liked to postpone or cancel !!

Because beyond any doubt, he is a martyr not a “show-stopper” !!

And……”the SHOW must go on” !!


Posted by on December 9, 2014 in Humor