RSS

Monthly Archives: August 2012

SLEEPWALKERS #9

sleepwalkers02

Moods and Modes

Of

Dr. Sleep Mode Singh

Nero Mood,
Poetry-mode

हज़ार जवाबों से है एक मेरी खामोशी अछी
कितने सवालों की मैने………आबरू रखी

नीरो से SMS, संगीत से शयरी, रोम हो गया.. …दिल्ली
कंजूसो कोल…कोल…करते हो मैने आग तो जलती रखी  !!

English Translation 😀

{ Silence is better than a thousand answers

It protects the sanctity of many questions!

From Nero to SMS, Rome to Delhi, my journey is full on,

Changed the body and the city…..but I kept the fire on!}

Nero Mood,
Sleep-mode :

No no……my name is not Rakhi……no…no it is not Sheela. Now I know, it is Nero my dear. My hobby used to be music…..but how long……oh ….how long….boring. Now….let there be some…..some..……poetry and call that Italian item girl….Munni let her……. oh let her continue her Tandav endlessly.

Madam ji U do Tandav and I….…continue poetry craze

Let the country burn…let us have more….…Delhi blaze !!

 

Nero Mood,

Poetry-mode :

Oh put some more coal and have one more coal…mine
Or take that mine, Oh, in this world nothing is……mine
what is there in a coal mine lets have poetry and…dine
Oh, the pleasure is mine and yours is that….coal mine !!

 
16 Comments

Posted by on August 29, 2012 in Humor

 

SLEEPWALKERS #8

sleepwalkers02 

              

Rising  Sports Star- Shri, Shri and Shri DailyEnjoy, hailed by Don Tinwari.

 

 

My dear Intelligentsia, today I have a very exciting, breaking-news to share from the world of sports. Of course, breaking news can, at times, be very funny. I mean an exciting breaking-news for some can be a heart-breaking news for some. As we say one man’s nectar is another man’s poison! So when I say a very exciting breaking news, I mean- for me. Therefore, exercising a stiff upper lip and taking over the role of a neutral journalist and a serious historian rolled into one, I share with you this welcome development (for me, at least) from the world of Sports :     

 

 

My friend, philosopher and guide Shri, Shri and Shri DailyEnjoy has become world’s Top-seeded, in the field of Bed-MingleTon. Do I see your scholarly eye-brows raised? Well you are fully justified in doing so because I do remember having told you that Swami ji was, no. 3 in the world. But I am also not wrong because the world of sports is a very dynamic and fast changing world. As one poet said, ”old order changeth, yielding place to new”. So, old order- namely Mr. Tinwari, and our dear friend Mr. Bill Clingon having just announced their retirement from active and international Bed-MingleTon, we are left with what ? Our own, popular, 100% indigenous  and very very promising (of exciting things to come !)  sports   star –my path-finder and  path-guider, my great guru Swami Shri, Shri and Shri DailyEnjoy Ha…ha…ha…oh sorry.    

 

 

Forgive me, I got carried away a bit. I mean I do realize how Tinwari and Clingon fans all over the world, must be feeling. A big blow for them and therefore, they are fully justified if they are feeling a bit low. Especially so, for Mr.Bill ClingOn fans, as his mixed double partner sunny Ms. Leone Whisky has also officially left him and  decided to settle down in India permanently  and to be the new mixed-double partner for the new sports icon – our Swami ji. What a nice pair and what nice mating. But Tinwari fans can not complain because Mr. Tinwari has been ‘conferred upon’ the ‘Don-man-ship’ by the Bed-MingleTon association of India. And….the Union minister for Odd and Hostile affairs and the chairman of the Incredible Indoor Sports Development Authority, Mr. Ajib Shukla himself conferred the rare honour on the new Don.

 

 

 Mr. Shukla, in fact, was all praise for Don Tinwari and Swami ji and he promised to develop Bed-MingleTon in villages and all the small and big cities, including the metros and requested all the big corporate houses and Bollywood and Otherwoods, to come forward with their help, active and proactive participation and co-operation, especially, their Casting Couch and Van Associations headed by that ‘madmast’ genius Madhosh Bhatt. To our (and every Indian’s) further delight, Mr. Shukla also made this disclosure, by way of icing on the cake, that they were trying their level best and that too with a lot of success already, to get Bed-MingleTon included in the next Olympic games and for that the government is planning to expand the  existing sports infrastructure and we should not be surprised if, in the immediate and near future, we see Bed-MingleTon courts built in every village, city, locality and bus-stands and railway stations, under the direct supervision and expert advice and for some lucky few, ‘on the court’ live training, by the veteran, Don N.D. Tinwari himself. Wow !!!

 

 

In the end there were these three very touching and memorable speeches by Don, Ms. Whisky and Swamy ji  :

 

 

Don :  “ Countrymen,…ah..mm…… this is a very touching and moving (literally!) moment for me. For the last over…..eh….mmm…. 70 years I have, lived, visualized, planned, executed, played and…ah…mm….. slept, only Bed-MigleTon. So I am leaving this – my first love and crush, with a very…eh…mm…. heavy heart and….ah…….feet. But I am leaving you, especially my mixed double partners in able,  stable,….ah…mm…. warm and….ah..eh…mm….loving  hands of my successor –our swami ji. I and Bill….. indeed were…. the greatest but Swami ji is…….the Latest. So, countrymen, hail the saviour ! “

Shri, Shri and Shri, ( holding sunny Ms. Leone Whisky’s hand)   :  “ Anand….Param Anand……Shanti…..I feel at peace….with my self……and you all and this universe……and My Universal Master. Oh …what bliss. In fact, He Himself visited me last night and blessed me and…… He has also sent His Love and Blessings to you all. My children (both spiritual and others !), as long as there are spiritual gurus like me, don’t worry about anything. I guarantee nirvana for everyone especially, when women power, ’the Shaktee’ herself is with me.  Our respected Ramdev ji is already busy in the right direction, struggling for bringing back the black money from foreign banks and  see – I  HAVE  ALREADY  BROUGHT A WHITE FOREIGN JEWEL – in the shape of our beloved sunny Ms. Leone Whisky.”   

  

 

Sunny Ms. Leone Whisky : “ Thank you and** Bleep** you all. I am very much moved and…… touched, in fact by everyone. I am so honoured and excited after wearing clothes…..I mean Indian clothes.”

 
8 Comments

Posted by on August 25, 2012 in Humor

 

SLEEPWALKERS #7

sleepwalkers02

COAL-GATE

It happens only in India

Honest Dr. S.M. Singh doing Coal-Gate and selling the nation at his rates,
This happens when you import Italy-made honesty, loyalty and…Patriots !!

Raja’s 3 G and Kalmadi’s deeds.. hard to beat, both welcome behind Tihar Gates,
Rahbhool reluctant C – Party in-wait, for good guidance from 1st family’s – pets,
The Rapist-politicians taking turns to loot, the government of educated…cheats !!

Read the rest of this entry »

 
7 Comments

Posted by on August 19, 2012 in Humor

 

SLEEPWALKERS #6

sleepwalkers02

 Moods and Modes

 of    

 

 Dr. SM Singh (Sleep Mode Singh)

PM

  

 

  Sleep Mode :

 

  I vaguely remember,…. my name must have been… or should have been Mohana. I am almost sure….. someone used to call me by that name….. but who that person was, I have forgotten. Who can remember….. unimportant details, I mean…… what is there in a name. And my latest habit of slipping into sleep-modes has also…. not helped much in this direction……. These days I am rarely on active mode.  Now some call me SM Singh (Sardar Mute Singh), some (very annoying) call Mon Mon Singh and some call me Servant Memsaab Singh– of that imported HHC (High-heel-Command).

  Read the rest of this entry »

 
8 Comments

Posted by on August 13, 2012 in Humor

 

SLEEPWALKERS #5

sleepwalkers02 

Baalu Prasaar Yadav

h/o (husband of) Burfi Devi Yadav.

Supremo WPIP (Whichever Party in Power)

 

(Excerpts from an interview with Baalu Yadav.)

By TV Channel, Bhor& Bore-Well Live !!

 

 

Reporter Ms. Chipak :  Baalu Yadav ji, What is this – ’Baalu’?

Baalu :  Did I ask you Bhat iz thish Bhor& Bore- well Live? Or bhatt iz dis Chipak..wa?

 

Reporter  :   No no Baalu ji our viewers have asked this question.

Baalu :       Oh Bhewers that means voters ..ok, See this is a long story. When I was young, I fell in love with Burfy Devi. One day, I sent a love letter to her and when she replied, she handed over the letter to a little girl and told that girl to deliver the letter to “that man” who as she told, “is kanbaalu” or has more hair on his ears than his head. Over the years the name kind of got stuck and slowly became Baalu. When I was born my name was La Chara (the Fodder) because I was very fond of fodder. In fact, fodder is my first crush !

Read the rest of this entry »

 
13 Comments

Posted by on August 7, 2012 in Humor

 

About

About.I have distributed my being among and into my characters – if you want, meet my characters and assemble my bits and pieces and reconstruct ‘the naughty and the tricky me’ !!!

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on August 6, 2012 in Humor

 

SLEEPWALKERS #4

sleepwalkers02

Shri Sugar Powar

Supremo- Negotiable Commitment Party   

 

Shri Sugar Powar is in many ways, ladies and gentlemen, my role model in life. For one, he stopped eating Bread & Butter and switched over to a ‘ balanced diet’ very early in his precious and inspiring (for people like me who need to be led in the field of moonlighting) professional life. Secondly, he has been very creative and innovative in devising new and fruitful ways, methods and methodology in the field of this great seductive addiction – ‘balanced diet’.

 

I am of the opinion and I am sure, that had he been not in the field of politics, he would have been a highly successful dietician. Not only he has kept a complete ( daily, weekly, monthly and yearly) diet- chart which he eats religiously and regularly, he is also regarded as the best arranger of balanced ( and sometimes, extra-balanced) diet supplies. And he is not fussy, to top it all. He can and does eat anything under the sun or…..whatever he looks at… and his eyes go everywhere.

 

 

When he entered the sports arena, I and the whole country thought he dialed a wrong number and he would starve…. but no sir. He got the whole board – I mean ICCB (International Cricket Compromise Board) – reorganized in such a way that it started yielding hefty ‘balanced diet’ in no time. He fixed them….and….. their matches, for good and collected a good ’catch’ of balanced diet based on that famous maxim:

Matches win Catches!  

 

Long live Sugar Powar and his Negotiable Commitment Party!!!

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on August 2, 2012 in Humor